Saturday, July 25, 2009

Modern-Day Alchemy

I was driving along when I passed by what was supposed to be an "upscale" car dealership. This is the kind of place where I imagine they give you a shiatsu massage while you contemplate whether you want the option package including the built in hang glider or the ejection seat. The kind of outfit where all of the seating arrangements are covered in fine Corinthian leather and the smell of musk fills the air. The salespeople all wear overly tailored suits and speak in fake-sounding, affected European accents. They are trying as much to sell you an image or feeling as they are trying to sell you an exotic and expensive car. I am sure they hold regular staff meetings about how to act more snooty and how to avoid making eye contact with the clientele. I am sure that you can picture the scene.

Well if this is what is appears to be, how come a brief drive-by survey of their lot included two (count 'em two) Dodge Neons and what looked to be a 1980 Ford pickup with lovely rust stains on the doors? These pièces de résistance were parked humorously amongst the BMWs and Audis. Did they think that they were fooling anyone here? Did they not even stop to consider that this was doing damage to the cultivated image that they were trying to maintain? Did they somehow believe in some kind of modern-day alchemy that if they parked these low-end vehicles near more expensive ones that some sort of transformation might occur? Yeah, that's gotta be the explanation. It's the only one that I can come up with that makes any sense.