Wednesday, July 22, 2009


Ladies and gentlemen . . . and now the moment you've all been waiting for . . . (the crowd roars in anticipation) . . . the award for the world's most impatient person goes to . . . Dang! Will they just get on with it! Why does everything have to be dragged out to such an extreme?

Folks, I ended up taking home the trophy that night. In fact, my mantle is overflowing with those annoying golden statuettes. I bet that anyone could probably have guessed this just by spending a few moments with me.

I am impatient when I drive:
  • Why can't they just get into the turning lane?
  • Why are they just poking along?
  • Right turn on red is allowed you moron! Go!
I am impatient at the grocery store:
  • Does it really take that long to pick out of a box of cereal?
  • Stop being so oblivious, get your cart out of the middle of the aisle.
  • Why are you writing a check?
I am impatient in meetings at work:
  • Why is this idiot blathering on and on?
  • Man, get to the point!
  • Won't this useless meeting ever end?
What's amusing in a sad kind of way is that I am impatient with others in situations where their actions have no impact on me. How's that for a full blown case of man-you-are-disturbed-itis?

I thought I would end with a few calming, soothing words from scripture that should help take the edge off. Maybe next time someone else will take home the award.

And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone, 1 Thessalonians 5:14

Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires, James 1:19-20

I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry, Psalm 40:1