Resolutions 2012

Each year at the end of December I prepare a brief list of resolutions for the new year. This list represents areas in my life where there is something that I recognize needs my time and attention. Of course, as I make up this set of resolutions for the upcoming 12 months, I also look back over the finished year's list to see how well I succeeded with my goals. I wish that I could say that I was completely successful at what I set out to do, but there are definitely some areas where I swung and I missed. Perhaps the lesson is that I should make my list easier? Maybe though, I can accept the fact that personal growth is difficult and that things that really matter will take significant and consistent effort.

Now I am no exhibitionist, but though my resolutions are deeply personal to me, perhaps by sharing I can help to encourage someone out there to realize that we all struggle to improve ourselves and success is spotty at best. So, here is my list of 2012 resolutions with a brief commentary for each item.

1. To start a relationship with the woman of my dreams - I had no dates this year and did not speak to a single woman this year socially. I have zero prospects at any level and am more than discouraged by my progress in this area.
   
2. To exercise the whole year - I was very successful and consistent with my exercising this year and my health was quite good.
   
3. To make several new friends - I met a couple at my church and we had dinner together a couple of times late this year. I think that this amounts to some small degree of progress.
   
4. To grow closer to God - I wanted to be more intentional with my night-time devotional period. For a time I was giving a quick prayer at the T.V. commercial break. I was either half asleep or easily distracted. Now I have settled into a time of quiet and humble approach before bedtime that has been quite satisfying.
   
5. To grow closer to my daughter - I have given to my daughter all that she allows me to give. I do the best that I am capable of given who I am and given who she is.
   
6. To embrace adventure and living to a higher degree - I can only give myself the lowest possible marks in this area. I have never had skill coming up with my own adventures and no adventures from other sources have come my way. This is both frustrating and demoralizing to me.
   
7. To find some degree of happiness and peace - For me happiness and peace have never been conditions that I could work to attain. It seems that they are a by-product of my circumstances and of fate. This past year was a very painful and difficult one for me in so many areas. Happiness and peace were infrequent visitors this year.
   

Now I will prepare my list of resolutions for 2013 and plan to give my best effort to be successful on each one. Hopefully when I look back at the end of 2013, my success will be mind blowing. The key is to keep trying.