Tuesday, September 18, 2012


I wanted to share with you a bit of the flavor of my most recent visit to the dentist for my semi-annual teeth cleaning. The following bits of dialog occurred after the suction hose was inserted into my cheek and the hygenist had her fingers and cleaning tools in my mouth.

Hygenist - Sir, your home care is some of the worst that I have ever seen.
Me - Glurgh ...

Hygenist - I bet that you must suffer from really bad breath all the time.
Me - Urgh?

Hygenist - I am from New York and I was raised to keep it real. Your mouth is disgusting.
Me - Flauf.

Hygenist - I can't believe this. I have never seen anything else like this.
Me - Hrumf.

Shortly after the hygenist completed her beat down, the dentist came into the room to do his usual quick look-see.

Dentist - Wow, your teeth look great. I wish I had a set of chompers like yours. Keep doing what you have been doing.
Me - Geez, your soul-stealing succubus had a vastly different opinion.
Dentist - Succubus you say?

Shortly after I was done with the hygenist (who was not the regular one I normally see), I went down to another lady to get some new x-rays taken. She could not have been more sweet or welcoming. She actually spoke in a way that showed me respect and caused me to listen to her and take her advice seriously. I think that there is a lesson here.