Jocularity, Jocularity

My friend Beni sent me the following lists entitled "Only in America" and "Ever Wonder?". I expect that you may have seen most or all of these before, but they might still make you smile.

Only in America ...

• do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
  
• do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.
  
• do banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.
  
• do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.
  
• do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.
  
• do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.
  

Ever wonder?

• Why the sun lightens our hair but darkens our skin?
  
• Why women can't put on mascara with their mouth closed?
  
• Why don't you ever see the headline 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?
  
• Why is 'abbreviated' such a long word?
  
• Why is it that doctors call what they do 'practice'?
  
• Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?
  
• Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
  
• Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?
  
• Why isn't there mouse-flavored cat food?
  
• Why didn't Noah swat those two mosquitoes?
  
• Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?
  
• You know that indestructible black box that is used on airplanes? Why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?!
  
• Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?
  
• Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?
  
• If con is the opposite of pro, is Congress the opposite of progress?
  
• If flying is so safe, why do they call the airport the terminal?