Thursday, March 22, 2012

Grind My Gears 27

Let's face it, some people out there are just plain annoying. My guess is that they are completely unaware of just how utterly distasteful they are to the rest of us. Their demeanor and way of life just make everyone around them want to retch. They fill the room with an intense feeling of malaise, almost like a freshly opened bag of jasmine-scented potpourri. If you go out in public, it likely will take you only a moment to spot one of them. In the mall parking lot. At the grocery store. Even at your neighborhood cemetery. These buckwheat kernels betray themselves because they feel compelled to flagrantly back their vehicles into their parking spots instead of just pulling straight in like a normal individual. Nope, not these buttered scones. I mean the excessive craning of their necks as they ceaselessly snap their pin-like heads from their side mirrors to their rear-view mirror and back again, the exaggerated hand-over-hand pawing at their steering wheels, the eighty-five times they switch between drive and reverse on their gear shifts as they inch back and forth and back and forth. Do they think they are somehow saving time with this inane practice? Are they in training to be the get-away driver for some planned bank job? These people really just grind my gears.