Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Serpent

It starts out as a peaceful night at home alone - a good meal, followed by some light household chores and a bit of reading. Along the way my mind begins to relax, letting go of the burdens and challenges that had occupied it and kept it on focus during the day. In this posture, it can happen that the seed of a lustful thought germinates or an impure image flashes across my mind, demanding my attention with its potent lure. The moment of the serpent is at hand.

On such a night as this, the serpent sometimes carries me away before I even have an instant to recognize what I have allowed to happen. In the moment the sensations are empowering, controlling, overwhelming, and I am all too easily lost in the carnal riptides that pull me under. Only when I regain some modicum of my senses, do I recognize how far the serpent has taken me from the path that I know I am supposed to be on. It is a sickening feeling of failure, of weakness, of betrayal, of sin. How many times have I vowed the oath of never again?

On such a night as this, sometimes I call to bear sufficient strength to vanquish the siren's song of the beast. When he recognizes that he shall find no quarter within me, he slinks off elsewhere for other prey, for his next victim. This feeling of victory and strength far outweighs any momentary pleasure that the serpent can deliver.