We were having a bit of trouble between us. Compounding the situation was a few-day business trip. In retrospect, it probably erased any progress that we had made. In retrospect, I probably should have cancelled the trip and never gotten on that plane. Although there is no way to go back and take a different road, it is nearly certain that it wouldn't have made any difference in the outcome. While I was gone, making an appearance, I was worthless to those around me. My mind was scrambling. The din of my surroundings was pushing me to the point of madness. I had to get out. I had to get away to think about you. I had to get away to think about me. So, I went out for a long drive ...I didn't get very far as 10 minutes into my escape I saw a sign indicating a park where we used to go for walks. When I pulled down that gravel road, the pebbles hitting up against the floor boards caused some very vivid pictures to flood my mind of quiet, passionate times from our long ago. Silly giggles, private jokes, hand-in-hand moments where the rest of the world and our troubles disappeared into the aether for a spell. It was both uplifting and depressing as I looked into the distance. However, something inside me was energized to communicate your inestimable worth to me in a way that I could not verbally. I spent the next several hours picking out a small token of my heart, ultimately enwrapped with crisp, vibrant paper in hues and shades that would make you look that way at me again, even just for a moment ...
Finding my way back, I thought I was laying the world at your feet. I thought it was something that could mark a watershed in our path. The thought of you lighting up at that possibility had sustained me for days. Yet I was met with darkness and silence. Closed doors and cold eyes. Perhaps, I thought, that time would help me to advance my case. But, alas, that beautiful package was found out by the curb on collection day. So too was my past, present, and future ...
