Monday, May 4, 2015

Reflections

From a certain perspective and with a bit of a critical eye I have been observing him. Avoiding deep considerations and moral ponderings, it is almost natural to track how he has changed over the years. I wonder if he is struggling with his faith, back-sliding, or just numb and jaded.
  • For years he volunteed after service to handle whatever jobs needed to be done. Now he slips from the back of the sanctuary before even the last echoes of the preacher's voice have died out.
  • He used to participate in after-hours bible studies once a week to get deeper into the word and to connect with others in Christian community. Now it seems that he is firmly against any sort of involvement in these meetings.
  • I used to see him clapping and smiling during the baptism services, celebrating with others who have gone public with their faith. Now he sits there staring at the floor with a wholly detached and distant demeanor.
  • He used to so enjoy the first 20 minutes of the service when the band played three or four songs. You could see him singing and swaying to the music. Now he almost seems like he is actively working to shut out each and every note.
  • Before the start of the service he used to take some measure of joy into talking with the few folks that he knew, exchanging pleasantries or a laugh. Now he actively avoids human interaction and seems that he would rather just be left alone.
From a certain perspective and with a bit of a critical eye I have been observing him ... each time that I look in the mirror.