Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Huck-a-Speak

I recently wrote a post entitled Cracking the Books about what to do with books that come your way as well-meaning gifts, but that you would never select for yourself in a cagillion years. This is relevant for me, because I received the book Do the Right Thing written in 2008 by former presidential candidate Mike "Huckleberry" Huckabee. For those who don't appreciate this about me, I am as apolitical as they come. I don't know my right from my left, my liberal from my conservative, my democrat from my republican. Based on what I hear and read on a daily basis of politicians and their doings, I would just assume not be tainted by any of this. Quoting Michael Stipe, withdrawal in disgust is not the same as apathy. Anyway, after reading this book from the former two-term governor of Arkansas, this is what I came away with.
  • Mike "Huck" Huckabee is a republican. If you are not a republican you are a cretin and likely wet your bed regularly. Seriously.
  • Huck dislikes Mitt Romney with a passion.
  • The Huckster is the only person who ever ran for president that had an ounce of common sense.
  • Huckaboo is the only fiscally responsible person on the planet. Maybe the only fiscally responsible person who ever lived.
  • Hucky is the only candidate who is a regular Joe, just like you and me. He had to walk to school in his hand-me-down coulottes, uphill both ways, carrying 100-lb sacks of coal in each hand.
  • The H man is the only candidate who loves his family, likely because they worked on his campaign for free.
  • Huckeroo has a deep man crush on Chuck Norris that borders on disturbing.
  • Mike Huckabee really dislikes Mitt Romney with a passion.
O.K., so I had a bit of fun making my list. Actually, I get a sense that Mike Huckabee is a reasonably decent guy who did, by most accounts, at least a reasonable job as governor of Arkansas. In this book, he made clear his political point of view and his values. Of course, in this book he paints himself in only positive colors, but he has his share of political baggage that he never addresses. However, the purpose of this book is unclear. Why write a book immediately after a failed presidential campaign that would long since be forgotten before the next campaign season rolled around? Also, frankly, his notions of how our federal government operates come across as more than a bit "aw shucks" naive. No vision statements or rousing speeches laced with references to common sense or rolling up our sleeves to do the hard work of the American people will ever change how the system works. Neither will a self-aggrandizing book, no matter how folksy its style.